Conflict is inevitable in any relationship. This doesn’t always have to be a negative thing. There are 5 principles of interpersonal conflict. Our book discusses the 5 principles in detail from pages 225-230. I would like to focus primarily on the second principle but I’d like to quickly summarize all five principles for context and clarity. The first principle states that conflict is both natural and inevitable. The second principle discusses the two different ways conflict can be communicated, covertly and overtly. Third, conflict styles and meanings are shaped by social location. The fourth principle states that how we manage conflict influences its resolution and its impact on interpersonal climates. Lastly, the fifth principle shows us that conflict can be constructive for individuals and relationships. “We can build on these principles by discussing diverse ways that people approach and respond to conflict,” (pg. 230).
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Physical Violence is never acceptable |
Covert conflict exists when people express their feelings and disagreements indirectly (pg. 226). If I am angry at another person, I might try to do something to hurt or upset them. I don’t think this is the healthy way to deal with conflict but if I’m not as invested in the relationship I tend not to put as much effort in and just react. A common form of covert conflict is passive aggression, which is acting aggressively while denying feelings or acting aggressive. The women in my family tend to engage in yelling matches and direct verbal putdowns while my dad is very passive aggressive. He will sometimes act cold and distant all while denying that anything is wrong at all.
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Funny you bring up this topic considering I came across these videos on Youtube, expressing love, anger and sadness overtly. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AaTVyf6dzOE
ReplyDeleteThey are almost freaky like the film "The Ring," but not as much. Take a peek and let me know what you think?
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DeleteI did not enjoy watching that. The sound in the background was disturbing. It sounded like someone sitting on a plastic covered couch. It looked as if the person in the video was cursing a lot and talking to themself in a hurried manner. What is the relevance with this video and overt expressions of conflict?
ReplyDeleteHi, the video illustrates an example of overt conflict. Clearly distinguish from covert conflict, the yelling, putting emotions forward, can transform conflict to a violent one. Overt conflict discourages third party intervention for settling or resolving the conflict.
DeleteYes it was strange I know, But this film was part of a series of non-verbal emotions expressed overtly, but without the words. In these instances we get a glimpse of what someones facial reactions and expressions would look like if they were in an overt conflict. This was one of the 5 films, the others express other emotions. So in a sense I posted this as an example of what someones face might look like with overtly expressing anger in a heated conflict.
ReplyDeleteOh! That makes a lot more sense. At first, the video was so confusing because when I think of overt conflict I think of outloud discussion. After hearing your explanation of the video, I think it is interesting to examine the face of someone who is expressing themselves overtly without hearing the sound. They look so upset, torn, sad, and angry. Thanks for the different perspective.
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